- This topic has 3 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 15 years, 5 months ago by
April Masini.
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March 23, 2010 at 11:03 am #2101
relationshipa1
KeymasterOK… hey… I have a boyfriend for the past three years, on and off.. We are not compatible at all. We fight every day, quarrel for small petty things but the sex life is the best… But while we were off for about 3 months, i found a new friend, lets call my boyfriend Karl and my friend nick. So nick, he’s the sweetest, he treats me great. He lives around my area and i’ve been watching him since the first time i saw him about 4-5 years ago. He tried several times to meet me and get to know me but i was already in a relationship with Karl. So i ignored him unwillingly. But as karl and i broke up i started talkin to nick and he’s the best. But about 1month into knowing him i found out he has a girlfriend, which he didnt want me to know because he said he wants to be with me but he wants to wait till he fully gets her out of his life, which he’s working on. The thing is we have sex every week. and everyday we talk or text and he always texts me as he wakes up..ok point being… I really like him.. he and i are great together… I lie to be with him. I tell karl im goin by m mom and i go by nick to spend the night. Nick doesnt know about karl though. I’m confused… I want to know which one to be with and make a life with… Bu ti really like Nick and Karl and i aren’t working out so I dont know.. Can you help me? March 23, 2010 at 12:29 pm #13136April Masini
KeymasterYour problem is not the choice of men you’ve posed. Your problem is you and your own behavior. You’re not very honest or respectful — of yourself! 😮 If you’re not compatible with your boyfriend of three years, why on earth would you stay with him? If you quarrel every day, but have great sex, you’ve got to understand that eventually the quarreling is what will become first and foremost — especially if you’re looking, as you said, “to make a life” with one of these men. Sex ebbs and flows in any long term relationship, but the quarreling that starts out as daily is only going to get worse. So he’s totally Mr. Wrong for you.
As for this new guy, are you kidding me??
😯 You he didn’t tell you about his girlfriend until a month into dating him? The guy is not honest with you — AND you continue to have sex with him once a week while he continues his relationship with his long-term girlfriend?😳 And he’s promising you he’s going to break up with her — one day…?? Wow. You really are gullible. And to boot, you haven’t told him you’re still seeing your on again off again boyfriend of three years?This is a mess and none of these guys are right for you, and you sure aren’t right for either of them.
My advice for you is not to choose one of them (since you’re already choosing to be with and lie to both of them), but to spend some time with no men and try and get your head on straight about what you want in your life and how to get it. If you really want a man to “make a life with” you need to stop dating, read my book called Think & Date Like A Man that you can download here:
[url]http://www.askapril.com/relationship-dating-advice/think-and-date-like-a-man.html [/url] I know this isn’t what you wanted to hear, but I think it’s the best advice for you.
March 23, 2010 at 6:16 pm #11133Anonymous
ParticipantThank you alot. I think i would really take your advice. But honestly, i really like the guy. I believe what he says though because he has shown me that he doesn’t see her and that she knows about me. I just have a feeling things would work out. But i’ll take your advice even though and try what you say and see how i feel after. March 24, 2010 at 2:11 pm #11601KeymasterGood luck — I do hope you’ll get my book and read it, as well as taking my advice here. I think it will help you a lot. -
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