Freshly dumped... can u help me? - Relationship Advice Forum

This topic has 4 replies, 4 voices, and was last updated 9 years, 7 months ago by April Masini.

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May 12, 2009 at 1:38 pm #970

brownman
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My girlfriend of 3 months broke up with me just under 2 weeks ago. I know we haven’t been dating a long time but I’ve known this girl for a long time, we have a history and we get along great together. She said that she has feelings for me, that I’m a great boyfriend and that it’s not that she doesn’t want me she just doesn’t feel the connection that she needs, but we were together just three days earlier and I could see that she still wanted me at that time. I have talked to her about it a couple times since and I’m worried that I may have come off a little bit insecure and needy. She has said that it’s not the right time and that she’s confused. The other thing is that she has been really busy with school the whole time we’ve been dating but I have supported her and I will continue to support her and she knows that. We haven’t really been able to hang out more then once a week this whole time because of her schooling so we would text each other pretty much everyday. I haven’t called her and the last time I say her was a few days ago. I really want her back because I really feel that we are right for each other but I want to go about it the right way. There is a party in a week and a half that I will see her at and her birthday is a week after that. Could you please give me some advice on how to handle this situation without ruining any chance of ever getting back together with her. Your advice is greatly appreciated!

May 13, 2009 at 11:00 am #9169

joe2424
Participant

Hey Brownman,

Well, when you say schooling, do you mean college? I know what you’re going through as I’ve been there myself. I was dating a real knockout through college, and all of the sudden, one day she was confused. Being a 19 year old at the time, being bull headed, I let her go, and regreted it for quite a while. Some years later I ran into her on the internet, and she told me that with her schoolwork, and social life at the time, she just wasn’t ready for a committed relationship, and the feelings she had for me scared her. She knew she would be moving, wasn’t sure if I would go with her, and she was insecure about the future. Plus, college was party time for her when she wasn’t studying, and that had something to do with it also. She just didn’t have the time. If you like this girl then follow your gut. Not to freak you out, but there is not another guy involved is there? Hopefully she’ll come around, and realize what she gave up. You sound like a good guy, and I firmly believe that if it’s meant to be, then that’s what’s going to happen. Not sure if I gave you any great advice, I just wanted you to know you’re not alone!

May 13, 2009 at 12:29 pm #9170

brownman
Participant

Thanks Joe2424… Ya she is in college but she does it at home and she overloads herself. I’m sure there is not another guy, she would have no time for other guys. This girl is a knockout too but thats only a small part of what makes me want her so bad. I am trying to believe that if we are meant to be together we will end up back together but I’ve never been a destiny type of person and what freaks me out is that, even though she is a smart and mature person, there are a lot of manipulative guys out there that will work a girl just because she is hot and pretend they care about them for a while till they’re done with them and then ditch them. The last thing I want is for her to get hurt. My gut tells me to stay away for a while but what worries me too is that she might completely get over me if I don’t go after her. I’ve been with many girls in my life, good ones and bad, and even though she says she doesn’t feel the right connection, every part of me tells me that we are right for each other and I’ve never thought that way about any girl. Even though it’s hard I honestly feel that I should stay away from her for a while and let her figure out what she wants on her own but I don’t want to end up regretting not going after her and possibly losing the girl of my dreams.

May 14, 2009 at 7:17 am #9173

tricia
Participant

I think your girlfriend really loves you but she was longing for something from you. She loves you but the two of you don’t have enough time for each other. The communication should always be present on every relationship as this play an important factor for a successful relationship. Love is not enough if the two of you don’ have time.

January 18, 2016 at 12:29 pm #31785

April Masini
Keymaster

Happy New Year! Let me know how things are going for you. 😉

I am here to help, and happy to answer any questions you have. 😀
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