[Guitarman]

I have this girl that I’m madly in love with, she completes me and whenever we aren’t talking, I’m thinking about her non stop. Anyway, she lives in England, I live in the USA. Our initial plans were for me to come there at the end of July for a week and then I would come back for four months in January. It’s not perfect but I’ll do anything to see her.

However, coming into it, I knew there was this other guy who was moving to England eventually and she liked him. Now the time has come and he’s moving there in two weeks. Today was suppose to be a small anniversary from the day we met and we were going to video chat all night but she ended up doing it with him instead. She got off with him for a little bit to chat with me but that lasted 20 minutes before she said she wanted to talk to him.

I know she loves me too, she just says it’s too hard being apart from me and he’s going to be right there with her so he seems like the easy option. I’m telling her to wait because it’s worth it for love but she still says its too hard. So now if she ends up with him, I lose the biggest part of my life and will honestly be lost without her.

How can I convince her that love is worth waiting for and that I’m worth the wait?

[Ask April Masini]

You can’t. 😳 She doesn’t want a long distance relationship, so you can move to England to be closer to her and see if she’ll date you once you’re there, or you can accept her limits and move on instead of trying to change her.

I’m sorry that isn’t what you want to hear, but if she’s clear with you, you need to respect that.

Hope to see you on Facebook at this link: [url][/url]. I’d love if you became a free member of my group page on Facebook! 😀

[Guitarman]

Thanks for the response, I think the problem is that she’s not being clear.

Yesterday, we were talking about being together and that stuff but then today after she talks to him, she’s not sure. I know a long distance relationships are tough work and it’s too hard for her but if she truly loves me, do you think she’ll realize it and realize the other guy is not for her?

[Ask April Masini]

Actions speak louder than words! This woman is being very clear with you that this other guy[i] “is the easy option”.[/i] That’s not a commitment to you or your feelings. It’s a commitment to herself and possibly to this other guy. I know you think she’s not being clear, but she is. You’re the one who doesn’t want to accept the fact that just because she completes you, you may not complete her. In fact, from her actions and her interest in this other guy, you don’t. 😳

At best, she’s playing the field and you’re one of the people she’s playing. At worst, she’s not interested in you and doesn’t know how to come right out and say so, so instead, she tells you she doesn’t want a long distance relationship, would rather date a guy who lives in her country than one who doesn’t, and likes this other guy enough to interrupt your anniversary video chat because this other guy is on the other line and she’d rather talk to him than you.

Sorry, but she’s not a sure thing by a long shot, and I don’t think it’s worth the transatlantic investment given what you’ve posted about the situation.

I hope this helps — I know it’s hard to hear.

Join me on Facebook — I’d love it if you became a member of my group page at: [url][/url]!

[Author]

Posts