[diva890627]

Hello,

I have been seeing this guy for about 2 months now. But I’ve known him for about a 1 1/2 years prior before because we used to work together. Ok let me give you all the details of what has happened between me and him.

It was my last week at work because I was about to be transferred to a different location because I finally got a full time job. I was telling all my co-workers about it and of course I told him as well. When it came to my last day being there I was in the back of the workroom doing my job and then he comes in and made little light talk with me and then says “Before I never see you again, I was wondering if you ever wanted to go get a drink sometime?” He said it kind of shy and it through me for a loop because I was not expecting that at all! I been had a crush on him for awhile, but I just thought he never liked me like that. Of course I said yes and then gave him my phone #. He sent me a text the next day wondering what would be a good day we could meet up. We meant up the next week for drinks and hung out for about 3 hours. He paid for the drinks (being a gentleman) and we were having great conversation and learning we have a lot in common. He walked me to my car and we hugged and went our separate ways. When I got home I checked my phone and saw he text me saying he a good night with me and he hopes to see me again. Of course I felt the same way and couldn’t wait to see him again. We meant again the next week (bare in mind I work full time and he works full time too, so it’s kind of hard for us to meet up). We went out for drinks again and still had a pretty good time together. There was some laughs and I still enjoyed myself with him. He paid for the drinks again and then walked me back to my car. We hugged and said our goodbyes. Got home and he texts me again saying he had a great time with me and likewise I felt the same. During our second date we already planned to go to the movies together the next week. Next week came to meet up and unfortunately he couldn’t make it. Not going to lie I was bummed about it, but figured he had something to take care of. The next day after I text him just to see how he was doing and he texts me back saying how he’s sorry we couldn’t meet up. I went ahead and told him I was a little bummed we couldn’t meet up, but tried to turn it around and say I’m sure you were busy and whatnot. He then opened up and told me that he was currently moving to a new place that’s closer to work and the contract almost fell through that day so he had to take care of that. Completely understandable. We planned on trying to go to the movies again next week. So third date is coming up which means we would probably share our first kiss right? Wrong. During the movie he held my hand for the first time and I could tell he was a little nervous because his hand kept shaking a bit. Which I found it to be really cute. So movie is over and we’re walking back to my car. He parked all the way on the other side of the movie theater so offer to drive him over to his car. As I’m driving him over to his car, I couldn’t help but think ok when we get to his car I’m sure he’ll kiss me. We get there and he just says good night to me and gets out of my car and get’s in his and that’s that. To say I was disappointed is a understatement. So of course I couldn’t help but think oh maybe he doesn’t like me that. I couldn’t help but to start doubting myself with him. But he text me that night wishing me a goodnight. I guess I just figured then maybe he’s just a shy guy. Next week comes and this time I went to his house to watch a movie and we got pizza. Things were going fine watching the movie until a kiss scene came up in the movie and I felt him kind of looking at me like he wanted to make a move but was too nervous. So movie is over credits are going up and that’s when low and behold he leans in to kiss me! And the kiss was very….sweet 🙂 We kissed for a little while and then just kind of giggled about it (why I don’t know but we just did). I said to him “I’ve been waiting for you to kiss me.” He laughs and says “Yeah sorry I’m kind of shy.” After that we went and walked his dog around the neighborhood and then went back and played some video games. Then I leave and he walks me to my car and kisses me again. Of course I get a text from him and things just felt good then. Later he asks me to go over to his sister house to watch the preseason football game. Not a big fan of football but I just wanted to see him. So I said yes. I showed up thinking I’m just going to meet his sister, but it was his sister and mom there! I was not expecting to meet his mom at all, but what really threw me off was how he introduced me to them! He said this is my GIRLFRIEND Sara! We have never once talked about this so I had no idea we became exclusive. BUT things went well that day and his family is really sweet and nice. And deep down I been wanting to be his girlfriend. After that for the next couple of weeks I wasn’t able to see him due to him working more hours and him in the process of moving to his new place. But when we were finally able to meet again I got to hang at his new place and watch movie. He then showed me around his place and we ended up in his bedroom….no we did not have sex. Even though things were getting pretty hot and heavy between us I decided we should stop because I feel like we are still a little bit in the getting to know each other phase and just didn’t want to rush things between us. He completely understood and said he was fine with it. He also said when the moment is right between us we’ll both know. That definetely made me feel reassure that me and him are on the same page. From then on each week sometimes I would hang at his house and we would either play video games on watch another movie. Sometimes again we would get physical but I would always want to stop when I know things are going a little further and he would always understand and he would never pressure me. But whenever we are being physical I would feel this weird reassurance from him. It would be the way he looks at me. Especially when I leave from his place and when I look back at him he’s still staring at me giving me “the look”. Usually too the only time me and him talk when we don’t see each other is through text. And when we do text it’s only at night and it’s not for very long. I was going to have him come over to my place to meet my family and we hang for a bit, but unfortunatly during that week he got sick. He’s already told me before that whenever I’m ready to have him meet my family he’ll be ok with it and will be there. I love how he does not pressure me into anything when it comes to making these steps. Due to him being sick though I haven’t seen him in about a week and a half. So naturally I have been missing him. But I never wanted to come off clingy to him so I wasn’t sure if it was ok to text him “I miss you” I know I’m probably overthinking sending a simple 3 word text but I felt like he would feel overwhelmed or whatever if I sent that. But a las I sent it to him anyway and the response I got back was “Thanks s, hopefully we’ll see each other soon” I’m not sure why but this just threw me off. I guess I was just hoping he would say I miss you too or something like that. I think I’m compeltely overexagerating this, but I just don’t know. Can you please explain to me what it means when a guy responds back to a text like he did?

Sorry for the long post, but I felt I should explain how everything has been between us all the way up to now.

[April Masini, your AskApril]

It sounds like your having him meet your family was too much too soon. I know — you’re probably going to say, well he introduced me to his mom and sister, so why shouldn’t I introduce him to mine? — but not everything in life is equal, and since you already know he’s a shy person, naturally, it sounds like he got scared off. Two months of dating, generally, is too soon to start meeting the parents because as you can see, there’s not enough of a commitment, normally at the two month mark.

My advice is to back off from anything that feels like a commitment or pressure from you, and instead, amp up your flirting with him to try and entice him to want to be with you. Don’t be too available, so that you feel more like a prize to him, than a sure thing (much less attractive! 😉 ) and be the girlfriend you want him to win.

I hope this helps. Let me know how things go.

[b]Everyone likes to be liked! If the advice you found on AskApril.com was helpful “like” us on FB — and tell a friend!
[url][/url]
And… you can follow my interviews and advice in the press on Twitter [i]@AskAprilcom[/i][/b]

[Member]

Posts