Shy guy…?

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  • #1054
    casey814
    Participant

    Okay.. a good friend of mine who I am well aware is extremely shy told me out of the blue that he has feelings for me. We have been friends for around 6 months and although I love him as a friend had never thought of him as anything else. Now that he let out his feelings I have realized that I to really have feelings for him and want more. However…. since the day he told he has not spoken to me. I have text and emailed him a few times and he refuses to respond. I have even been in the same room as him and he did not acknowledge me, which is very strange as we have always been friends. I don’t want to pursue a relationship to the point it ruins our friendship but also if there is a chance it could be more I dont want to miss that either. Help please……..

    #9498
    April Masini
    Keymaster

    Well….if he doesn’t even acknowledge you when you’re in the same room, there’s really not much of a relationship going on. Given that he’s showing you a cold shoulder since he told you he wants a romantic relationship with you, I wouldn’t put too much stock in the outcome.

    I think it would be wise for you to consider him a friend who likes you a lot, but probably would not be great boyfriend material. If he’s blown the friendship by exposing his feelings, and he isn’t able to recover the friendship, then that’s the outcome for now. He’s probably embarrassed over showing his vulnerability, not being sure of your feelings, perhaps changing his mind, or realizing he doesn’t want to be more than friends, or some other reason. Regardless, the best thing to do now is give the friendship some space to recover if that’s possible.

    My guess is that if you show him a “soft landing pad” by being the friend you’ve always been for him, then eventually, he’ll pull himself together and be able to be your friend again. But there’s always the possibility that he’s so sensitive that once he’s crossed the bridge of telling you his deeper feelings for you, he can’t swim back to the way things were.

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