[Anonymous]

So I have been dating the same guy for about three years. I absolutely love him to death. We have broken up and gotten back together once. We are both really young, and i relieze this, but it hasn’t changed anything. I leave for college in the fall, and because of this we deiced that it was for the best that we wheren’t together, because i’m going to school 12 hours away. For the first week or so I was okay with this, but then he started to become distant. I know it’s mainly because graduation is getting closer, but it really hurt me. Now we aren’t talking at all, and i’ve just been miserable. Then though i’m ivolved in a lot of things, he is all i think about. I’m starting to believe that I made the wrong choice, by choosing to leave. I was accepted to a school that is pretty much right down the street, and now i’m thinking that maybe that’s where I should be. So that maybe I would have a chance to fight for us. These past few weeks have been really hard, i haven’t been able to sleep, and anytime i see him i just want to cry.

I just don’t know what to do.

[Anonymous]

Don’t ever think that you made the wrong decision when doing something for yourself. I made the mistake of not going to college for a guy. We were in love and got married shortly after high school. After being together 4 years he came home one night and stated that he wanted a divorce and didnt love me anymore. Out of nowhere. I regret not going to school. I was blinded by love. Now im not saying to give up on your guy but what i do know is, EVERYTHING happens for a reason. Your education is important, especially with the economy the way it is now. It’s becoming more and more difficult to get a job without education. If you two are meant to be together, he will understand and it will work. Just give him time. If hes your Mr. Right he will come around. I know it may seem hard right now without him around. (believe me ive been there) Try to stay busy and try to focus on school and your friends. If its right, it will work!

[Ask April Masini]

Way to go, [b]Jodi_82[/b]! Great advice. 😀

I think, [b]Venom[/b], what you may be underestimating is the transition you’re going through in your life right now that has nothing to do with your boyfriend. You’re finishing high school. You’re going to be leaving home. You’re going to college for the first time in your life. In a city you don’t know as well as the one you’ve been raised in. That’s a LOT of change and stress for [i]anyone[/i].

Your decision to end things with your boyfriend because of these life changes was a mature one. Now, your emotions are pulling rank! 😕 You’re probably more scared about the changes in your life than you’re ready to cop to, and you’re focusing those feelings on missing your boyfriend.

This is one those times when you have to make decisions that will cause pain either way. Birth is a painful experience, but what comes out of it is so much bigger and better over time than the cost of that day of pain. In a way, you’re giving birth to yourself by starting this new part of your life. Going to college is a huge accomplishment, and separating from your family to forge the beginning of your adult life in a new city, is another accomplishment — both of which carry some difficulty and pain that most people overlook. I want you to focus on the bigger picture — building a future for yourself. Know that you’ll feel scared and sad along the way as you let go of some of the things that have brought you comfort up to now, but that you’re creating something bigger than you’re leaving behind.

Don’t re-register at a local school because you miss your boyfriend. It will be a mistake that will be more painful to recover from than the pain you’re feeling right now. Keep your eye on the horizon and your future as a successful woman who will find education, career and a fabulous relationship because of your assets and strength. This is the time for you to invest in yourself. Go forward.

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