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AnonymousMember #382,293ugh… I know the feeling of the frustration you are feeling.. I am/was going thru it myself… (I just got some good advice on here!) Its maddening when you are in a “good” relationship then the man just cuts it off for no reason.. or in your case no “good” reason. I dont know about you but its exhausting to sit and think of ways to try and make him change his mind.. or make him see that you are the one he needs to be with! Not saying that you are but I know I am guilty of that… It sounds to me like maybe he was just waiting for a good reason to break up.. If he’s not returning your texts or phone calls, he is obviously avoiding talking to you ( that was my whole last week 😉 ) and if he truly wanted to be with you and not lose you, he would at least speak to you and tell you why hes doing what hes doing. Men seem to always take the “easy” way out… which is so very hurtful to us women… all we want is the truth or an explanation, right? Obviously this is my opinion and I hope I didnt say anything upsetting, but Im just a fellow woman who is going thru a similar situation🙂 Sounds like you are too good for this man that doesnt see your fabulous qualities and he’ll kick himself in the a*% when the perfect man for you FINDS YOU!!!! best of life to you😀 AnonymousMember #382,293ahhhhh…Thank You!! Honesty is what I need to hear.. You couldnt be more correct.. I think its hard to see the plain reality of the situation because I get so emotionally involved… and way too soon… a habit of mine. You’ve just released a huge weight off of my shoulders as now I can take a step back and see how naive I can be sometimes… no matter how smart or strong I think I am! I felt extremely guilty from the start knowing he was married, and I should have listened to my instinct then. I cannot thank you enough for the “slap in the face”! You just made my day 😀 AnonymousMember #382,293Hi Luche, [b]I’m not April. So, definitely take what I’m saying with a grain of salt and focus on what she says when she answers.[/b] I have been in this situation way too many times to count, and I can tell you it’s not love; and you even know that. If you truly do love him and don’t think it is too fast, you wouldn’t be questioning it. Always trust your instincts. If it feels as if it is too fast, then it probably is. You have 1 option and 1 option only, and that is to tell him. He has 2: he can be hurt by what you’re telling him and get past it to move further with you OR he can get angry and breakup with you. If he does the 2nd one, then that obviously shows you it isn’t love. If he loves you or even wants to love you in his future, he wouldn’t throw this away so fast. If he can throw it away that easily, then the relationship wasn’t that valuable to him to begin with. Either way, you owe it to yourself first and him to be honest about your feelings. You don’t have to do it in a mean way, but your feelings need to be voiced. As far as how to do it: say to him what you said here about you getting caught up and how it went from there.As far as I go, I can say that as I’ve gotten older and made the same mistake as you’re describing too many times; I have learned how to harness those strong, “new relationship” feelings. It happens to everyone. Yet, the feeling of newness wears off; and the both of you have to be the ones to make it work after that has worn off.
AnonymousMember #382,293Apart from the issue of what, if anything, to tell your parents, I strongly suggest that you not meet someone you’ve met online — and only met in person once — at his house for awhile, until you get to know him better. 🙁 Meet somewhere public — like a restaurant until you feel comfortable. If you are not ready to be “physical” don’t send the message that you are by meeting[i]at his house[/i] .😕 AnonymousMember #382,29319 and 20. AnonymousMember #382,293I won’t mention the multitude of mistakes you’ve made, because others have already pointed them out, and they should be otherwise obvious to you. In your post, you don’t mention how your relationship with your wife is. Assuming it’s bad, then it’s time to file for a divorce and get on with your life.
If, in the rare event that your relationship with her is still relatively good (meaning: you talk regularly, do things together, have sex, et cetera), then I think the situation needs some more consideration than simply saying that you should leave her and get on with your life, however, that might be what you end up doing anyway.
First off, you shouldn’t be asking what she is to her wealthy client, because it’s not his feelings that really matter here. It’s hers, meaning, you need to find out what he is to her–does she care for him, does she even like him, or does she simply see him as a paycheck? She may even be seeing this as some sort of a way to “cut back” on escorting, because she’ll be having sex with less men but still making the same amount of money. There’s really no way to find out what he is to her without having a serious talk with her, which is something you should have had FAR before this point.
Next, you need to find out what YOU are to her. The reasons for this one should be obvious.
You should also find out what her reasons for continuing to be an escort are. Is it just the money (you say you make a decent living now, but I’m sure the “extra income” is still quite significant), or the thrill, some combination, or what?
Finally, you need to figure out what you can live with, and also what she can live with. Are you OK with her continuing to be an escort (from your post, it doesn’t seem if you’ve had much of an issue until she became “exclusive” with this client)? If so, for how long and under what conditions? Is she willing to stop at any point or for any reasons? And so on. It’s possible you two, depending on the situation, could work out some sort of compromise you could BOTH live with, such as her continuing to be an escort under certain conditions (assuming that’s acceptable to you), or her finding another job in a “similar” line of work (such as becoming a stripper, but one that’s NOT actually having sex with any of the clients). In the event you can’t find a compromise that works for both of you, get a divorce and get on with your life.
AnonymousMember #382,293Wow, your wife has been so selfish it’s scary. When the question of escorting first was put to her by her ‘friend’ (some friend they were), your wife was very very naive to believe that it would be a short term answer to your money worries.
There are always stories of women dipping their toes into the world of escorting / high paid prostitution (call it what you want) and then quickly becoming immersed by the money, sex and thrill. I would guess this happened to your wife.I would also guess that she quickly saw her body as her meal ticket, that she was earning fab money for how she looked. The breast implant situation, in my opinion, tells several things – firstly, she thought so little about you that she didnt consult your opinion on it at all. Secondly, she went bigger than you thought she would because she wanted to upgrade a big part of her body that earns her money. And finally there is a very very good chance she not only got them done for her client, but also they decided upon the size together.
You have some tough decisions to make. Like it or not she has evolved from escorting to being solely with that man. You either accept the situation or divorce her.
Have you spoken to her about how you are feeling since being told what he is offering her?
Good luck with everything
AnonymousMember #382,293God, you must feel awful. I can only imagine what’s going through your mind. Sadly, and it is very sad, your wife has told you (and this what she means) that she has quit the escorting game and is now in a relationship of whatever sort with this man.
How old is he? Do you know anything about him? Where does he take her when they are together? How often do they see each other?
Because she has escorted for such a long time this situation may seem normal to her, because she is used to sharing you with other men/women.
AnonymousMember #382,293I’m sorry to be the bringer of bad news, but you are long forgotten by her. She seems to be completely wrapped up in her boob job paying guy. She has began a relationship with him, one by which he is paying her to look her best for him. Soory, but you are out of the picture
🙁 xAnonymousMember #382,293She became his lover the moment she allowed him to pay for her big breast implants. She had them done because he wanted her to, and she knew having them done would mean he owned a part of her. Reading your story, your wife probably did have the best intentions when she started escroting. But she quickly became addicted to the world she was in. Meeting such a rich, giving client was unseen by her but no doubt very welcomed all the same.
You need to be prepared to share her fully with this other guy. You are correct though, she is no longer an escort – more like a highly paid lover to him.
AnonymousMember #382,293I would agree he is just playing games. I think with guys it can be an ego thing. He wanted to see if he could steal you away from your (then bf). I don’t really think he is worth pining over. AnonymousMember #382,293hi april , thanks for the suggestions . as u told the things would be same , so do you think i should keep this relation any more. ❓ AnonymousMember #382,293I was wanting some insight into this type of behavior. AnonymousMember #382,293I am 23 he is 26. I was 21 when we got together so really wasnt ready for marraige. June 9, 2011 at 2:10 pm in reply to: I m slightly partially deaf,is tat why ma girl dumped me? #17254AnonymousMember #382,293btw can any one explain how to read a women’s body language–whether she loves your company or not??
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